Monday, February 15, 2010
Sunday, February 14, 2010
First Post
Here is a very rough version of my pitch, most likely filled with a plethora of typos, and terrible grammar. Concepts and storyboards will soon follow.
The story begins as a short news segment called, Unresolved Legends. The production quality is shoddy, and it only comes on late at night. The network has been trying to eliminate the show because of its irrelevancy and low ratings. The host of the show walks on screen and begins talking about this episode's topic.
“Tonight, on Unresolved Legends, we go to Brewster, a quiet little town in upstate New York. Brewster has everything you would expect from a small village, a farm, the local supermarket, good eats, (camera cuts on each point, showing an example of each) and a great community (cut to several confused looking pedestrians).”
“However, only a couple of years back, Brewster almost had something that no other town has had before. A President. And not just any president, oh no. A Walrus President.”
Cut to a poster with the walrus's face photoshopped onto the famous picture of Nixon. Dramatic music plays.
The host continues speaking, “Mr. Walrus only intended to be mayor at first, but things quickly spun out of control.”
Cut to an interview with the walrus that was recorded during his campaign. The Walrus speaks, “I also plan on renovating the educational facilities in this town, and reducing property taxes.” The interviewer (Jim), who is staring in awe at the walrus, replies, “Is it difficult?”
“Difficult? Oh no, not particularly, once I become mayor it won't be hard at all the get things moving along.”
“Oh, I meant, uh, is it. . . is it difficult to speak?”
“Uh, no, not at all.”
“So are you from Seaworld? Did you ever do that trick where you balance a ball on your nose?”
“Uh no, I'm from Connecticut.”
“Do you like fish?”
The Walrus and Jim stare awkwardly at each other.
Cut to interviews with random pedestrians on the street. Middle aged man: “Oh I'd never seen anything like it. It was, well, it was a walrus running for mayor. Can't really say anything else.” A couple of other people comment about their surprise. “Well Brewster isn't really upstate, I mean, we're just like what, 50 miles from New York? Oh the walrus? Eh, just a passing fad.”
Cut to Mr. Walrus giving a speech outside. He talks about various changes that he plans to enact upon being elected. The crowed is unenthusiastic. On the stage (or deck, or whatever platform he is standing on) there are a couple of buckets filled with fish, that were brought as offerings. Near the back of the crowd, a couple of people hold up a poster with “WHERES MAH BUKKET” written over a picture of a walrus. They shout out what the poster says. After an awkward pause, Mr. Walrus dumps the fish out of one of the buckets on the stage, and holds it up in the air saying, “Here's your damn bucket.” The crowd goes crazy and cheers.
Host: “Mr. Walrus became a household name overnight.”
Cut to official posters of Mr. Walrus for mayor on lawns, telephone poles, and buildings.
“It didn't stop there though”
A girl puts up a roughly photoshopped poster that says, “Walrus Presidential Candidate”. The presidential posters quickly begin to outnumber the official posters.
Cut to a concert. The band that's playing dedicates their next song to Mr. Walrus and his campaign. They then play “I am the walrus”
In Mr. Walrus's office, him and his assistants discuss the situation. Mr. Walrus doesn't know what to make of it, he is extremely popular but no one is taking him seriously. An assistant points out that Mr. Walrus is a walrus.
Cut to a news report detailing how an angry mob managed to change the title of “mayor” to “president”
Cut to an interview with Mr. Walrus. The interviewer asks, “What do you have to say to these allegations of scandal brought up against you?” “Well I really don't know what this whole thing is about. I'm just trying to run for office, and everyone's going crazy. These damn kids are, well, I don't even know what they're doing.”
Cut to a group of people, young and old, singing “I am the walrus” while handing out pamphlets.
(The rest is not as fleshed out as the rest of the pitch)
Mr. Walrus ends up having issues with PETA, somehow. Eventually, he caves in under the pressure of being asked to do tricks for fish, and has a mental break down. He is found in an apartment devouring dozens of fish. A homeless guy, wearing broken electronics watches and entices him. Mr. Walrus is dropped from the election.
The story begins as a short news segment called, Unresolved Legends. The production quality is shoddy, and it only comes on late at night. The network has been trying to eliminate the show because of its irrelevancy and low ratings. The host of the show walks on screen and begins talking about this episode's topic.
“Tonight, on Unresolved Legends, we go to Brewster, a quiet little town in upstate New York. Brewster has everything you would expect from a small village, a farm, the local supermarket, good eats, (camera cuts on each point, showing an example of each) and a great community (cut to several confused looking pedestrians).”
“However, only a couple of years back, Brewster almost had something that no other town has had before. A President. And not just any president, oh no. A Walrus President.”
Cut to a poster with the walrus's face photoshopped onto the famous picture of Nixon. Dramatic music plays.
The host continues speaking, “Mr. Walrus only intended to be mayor at first, but things quickly spun out of control.”
Cut to an interview with the walrus that was recorded during his campaign. The Walrus speaks, “I also plan on renovating the educational facilities in this town, and reducing property taxes.” The interviewer (Jim), who is staring in awe at the walrus, replies, “Is it difficult?”
“Difficult? Oh no, not particularly, once I become mayor it won't be hard at all the get things moving along.”
“Oh, I meant, uh, is it. . . is it difficult to speak?”
“Uh, no, not at all.”
“So are you from Seaworld? Did you ever do that trick where you balance a ball on your nose?”
“Uh no, I'm from Connecticut.”
“Do you like fish?”
The Walrus and Jim stare awkwardly at each other.
Cut to interviews with random pedestrians on the street. Middle aged man: “Oh I'd never seen anything like it. It was, well, it was a walrus running for mayor. Can't really say anything else.” A couple of other people comment about their surprise. “Well Brewster isn't really upstate, I mean, we're just like what, 50 miles from New York? Oh the walrus? Eh, just a passing fad.”
Cut to Mr. Walrus giving a speech outside. He talks about various changes that he plans to enact upon being elected. The crowed is unenthusiastic. On the stage (or deck, or whatever platform he is standing on) there are a couple of buckets filled with fish, that were brought as offerings. Near the back of the crowd, a couple of people hold up a poster with “WHERES MAH BUKKET” written over a picture of a walrus. They shout out what the poster says. After an awkward pause, Mr. Walrus dumps the fish out of one of the buckets on the stage, and holds it up in the air saying, “Here's your damn bucket.” The crowd goes crazy and cheers.
Host: “Mr. Walrus became a household name overnight.”
Cut to official posters of Mr. Walrus for mayor on lawns, telephone poles, and buildings.
“It didn't stop there though”
A girl puts up a roughly photoshopped poster that says, “Walrus Presidential Candidate”. The presidential posters quickly begin to outnumber the official posters.
Cut to a concert. The band that's playing dedicates their next song to Mr. Walrus and his campaign. They then play “I am the walrus”
In Mr. Walrus's office, him and his assistants discuss the situation. Mr. Walrus doesn't know what to make of it, he is extremely popular but no one is taking him seriously. An assistant points out that Mr. Walrus is a walrus.
Cut to a news report detailing how an angry mob managed to change the title of “mayor” to “president”
Cut to an interview with Mr. Walrus. The interviewer asks, “What do you have to say to these allegations of scandal brought up against you?” “Well I really don't know what this whole thing is about. I'm just trying to run for office, and everyone's going crazy. These damn kids are, well, I don't even know what they're doing.”
Cut to a group of people, young and old, singing “I am the walrus” while handing out pamphlets.
(The rest is not as fleshed out as the rest of the pitch)
Mr. Walrus ends up having issues with PETA, somehow. Eventually, he caves in under the pressure of being asked to do tricks for fish, and has a mental break down. He is found in an apartment devouring dozens of fish. A homeless guy, wearing broken electronics watches and entices him. Mr. Walrus is dropped from the election.
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